ten ten ten OR diez diez diez OR zehn zehn zehn

I'm feeling playful this morning. Is it because I woke up and the clock that at first look read 10 a.m. actually read 7:57? (How I adore my old fashioned analog clocks.)

Is it because I showered before I watched CBS Sunday morning? (Which means I have a chance to be on time to church)

Is it because the Chilean miners are almost free? Maybe Wednesday!!

Is it because last night I had the chance to see a movie in a dark room, the chance to laugh and cry with strangers? (Life as we know it, the movie, not the TV show.)

Is it because after the movie, I talked to my mom in the car in the dark parking lot? Like a lot of mother daughter conversations, this one had to do with food and poop.

And after all this, I went to the grocery store, bought myself some flowers from Ecuador, raced to the other grocery store to buy almond milk (which by the way, yuk) and got home in time to putz around online until the first skit for SNL.

Yesterday was one of those days...a morning of too many pink Kleenexes being thrown off the cliff called my bed. Coffee and peppermint patties. A morning of self-medicating with Google searches. In the afternoon, I buckled down and worked on catalog errors. (This is even less and more fun than it sounds, believe me. And requires a lot of gray matter.) And by 4:30, I realized that if I didn't have a movie to go see, bad things might happen. And having spent the morning with too many pink Kleenexes and Google, I decided to search Yahoo movies.

I am grateful, that on the brink of my 39th birthday (a month and a half away) I am remembering what I can do to make me happy. Which includes CBS Sunday morning, chick flicks, feeding myself real food, talking to my mom, and blogging. I get to see Xander at 3 this afternoon. Still working out if we are friends or something more...but he's a great guy and I want to take the time to figure it out.

So...if I want to be on time to church, I better figure out what I'm wearing. Tootles. Enjoy this day, it won't come around for another 100 years. And it won't be on a Sunday for even longer than that.

Up up in the air, in my beautiful, my beautiful balloon...

(in which Sarah Louise plays film critic, poorly, and scours Rotten Tomatoes site to find proof that she is correct.)

Someone tell Hollywood that they need better storytellers. Two weeks in a row I've gone to the movies, expecting laughter and a good story. I got the first (I even got tears with today's dish) but story was lacking.

When I was just a girl (to the tune of "Loves me like a Rock" by Paul Simon) in English, we learned about the up and down of a plot. You have the beginning, the climax, and the rest. Sometimes you can get away with having the climax at the very end. But sometimes you can't. Especially if your story isn't strong.

That is what happened with the two vapid movies I saw the past two weeks.

(Spoiler alert: the two movies were "It's Complicated" and "Up in the Air.")

To preface, both had great trailers. And UITA had six actual people that I converse with online or in person tell me, "oh, good movie."

Um.

If you consider a movie that has good acting and makes you laugh enough, okay. But I don't. I want good story, and I will take bad acting if you give me good story.

Both of these movies were headed in one direction story wise, and then climaxed, and went in the opposite direction (or, in both cases, took the main character exactly to where they were when the movie started, just with a few more experiences under their belts.)

In "It's Complicated," Meryl Streep's ex-husband Alec Baldwin wants to get back together b/c his current marriage is failing. It sure looks like they're having fun and that this is where the movie is going. But no, we are not given all the information, and Meryl comes to the conclusion that they've been apart too long and it would never work. Now, yes, that is a good story. IF you fill it out with Meryl really wrestling with it. And you show not tell us how it's totally NOT going to work. But no, Nancy Meyers decided that she could just tell us that Meryl would be better off with her architect Steve Martin, who seemed entirely milque toast. Blech.

In "Up in the Air," George Clooney loves his life lived in airports and airplanes. He fires people for a living, he, the man who is kind of married to his job. Two women come into his life, one as a protege, one as a love interest. Wow, maybe George is going to have a chance to see what life is really about, relationships...and then WHAM! We find out that Alex (George's on the road lover) is married, with kids. That she was playing George, and figured George was playing along. OUCH! Now, yes, that is good storytelling. If you give us some foreshadowing. If you show us some character growth. However, if you then don't show George changing at all, and you then put George back up in the air (did I mention he was going to be grounded, the job was changing) and he's back where he was at the beginning. Nothing has changed, not really, except that now George realizes he's lonely. And then the movie ENDS.

Now, I like other work by these directors. Nancy Meyer's movie The Holiday is sheer chick flick smaltz and I eat it up. Yes, we have no idea if these transatlantic romances will work, but we don't care. They dance the night away and tomorrow will take care of itself.

I liked Thank you for not smoking and I adored Juno (Jason Reitman's other two films.)

Some other folks that agree with me on
:

From Dan Jardin's Cinemania: Jardin talks about the contrast of the folks that have lost their jobs (interesting, vibrant) to the boredom of the business travelers (Clooney, Farmigia, and Kendrick)

...these moments of honesty that hover around the fringes of the film serve mainly to highlight the banality of the main plot line and the superciliousness of the lives of the characters we are supposed to care about. I wanted to learn more about the real folks whose lives had been ruined, and would have been quite content had I never met [Clooney, Farmigia, or Kendrick.]

Jay Antani at Cinemawriter.com talks about the depth that could have happened in Reitman's movie:

It’s a movie of missed opportunities, wherein Reitman could have plumbed the dark depths of the betrayal, loneliness, and denial that make up the core of Bingham’s wounded self. He could, thereby, have made the moral payoff of his conclusion feel well-earned and satisfying. As it is, he’s got the right actor for the job, but his movie lacks the guts.

I could go on. But it's late, and this blogger is out of practice writing using other people's words...

I just think that if I'm going to spend good money on popcorn and a movie ticket that I should get a good story along with good acting. Because I care the most about story. I will forgive bad acting for good story, but NOT the other way around.

They're critics, honey, they hate themselves" * (spoilers)

*Patrick Dempsey's character to Reese Witherspoon's character in "Sweet Home Alabama"

Just finished watching Michael Clayton. [ed: this is not the review I read that got me to give in to putting this on my list.] Good flick. However...

Folks, I read reviews. I think I put this movie on my library queue (sorry, I don't do NetFlix) as a result of something I read in Christianity Today Movies. Sorry, can't find the link.

It was a good movie. But as a bipolar woman (better living through chemistry, I take my meds, thankyouverymuch) I would have liked to have known ahead of time that one of the main characters is a manic depressive lawyer who gets manic in the movie. (Who is later killed and they play it off as a suicide.)

Last night on the drive home I was listening to my local Christian station, because they play music on the weekends. At 5:18 or so, just as I'm somewhere on Rte. 8 every Saturday, they give us the Focus on the Family "Plugged in" review. Now, I'm not stupid. I know that an organization like FOF is going to pan the SATC movie. So why bother calling it "disgusting" when you're basically pandering to the audience that is just the choir, nodding along with you, wanting to hear you say what they already were thinking?

I don't know why "Hollywood" didn't choose to release any family friendly movies this weekend. I'm sure it's because they wanted to piss off the Christian Right. Maybe, you know, they wanted to highlight SATC. Maybe it's not a huge holiday weekend and when did Hollywood get a reputation for "family friendliness" anyways?

People who get pissed off at stuff were going to get pissed off anyways. They were already "disappointed," you just itched them where they were already scratching.

Augghghgh!!

Repeat after me: The world is good. The world is fallen. The world can be redeemed. (Phillip Yancey, in Reaching for the Invisible God.)

By the way, as soon as I listen to the commentary for Michael Clayton, I'm going to find a theater that's playing SATC. And not because I'm being rebellious. I like the show. I'm old enough.

And about that fourteen year old who started smoking because Carrie smoked? (Yes, this "sound clip" was quoted as a reason to not go see the movie. Did you read the entire article???)

She's now MORMON, a mom, and says this:

"Now that I'm older, looking back, I'm like, 'Oh my gosh, these women are in their 30s. What was I thinking?'" she said. "I'm not sure I'd want my little sister seeing the movie -- she's 14 -- but I think it's a fun show for people my age now, as long as you don't take it too seriously."

End of rant.

(Part of me says, don't hit publish, don't do it...so someone better comment.)

Sarah Louise has a pity party and you're not invited...

Oh, yes you are! Come on in, bring a hankie!

Let's see, I went to get antibiotics for the sinus infection, and whilst at the Big Bird (Giant Eagle) I bought a Vidalia onion and the latest copy of People, you know with Jenna Bush as a blushing bride on the cover. It's enough to make an old maid like me sing Johnny Cash (cry, cry, cry, and I don't mean the onion!) (I know I'm not an old maid, don't put that in the comments...)

Today was the last Mother Goose of the session and first I rammed the cart over my foot (ouch) and then while closing the room dividers, crunched my fingertips (ouch and double triple ouch). I know some of the kids I won't see again, cause they'll graduate to Kangaroo (for kids 24-36 mos.), or I'll be in Queens, or both...and I love my kiddies, I really do. When we sit there and sing

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray, you'll never know dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away,"

I think you. You are my sunshines, every dear child and mother or father or grandma. I almost got one of the Sally's that I work with (not to be confused with NH Sally) to take a picture of me doing MG this morning but thought maybe that was too sentimental and foolish.

There's a line from Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg (which is stacked under some pile of books at the moment) where Natalie writes about a restaurant she and her friends started after college, and how they knew that it didn't matter how thick or thin they sliced the vegetables, it mattered that they cared about what they were doing, and that that was what came through to the customers, that was the secret ingredient in the recipe. I often think about that when I do my Mother Goose sessions--they don't care if I get the words right or if I'm sitting on the floor or on a chair. They can tell that I adore them and I adore what I'm doing.

Sigh. A line that has been resonating with me from Emotionally Healthy Spirituality: "Resurrection only comes out of death--real death. Our losses are real."

I went for a walk this evening, just at dusk, around 8:30 here--I love that I live so West that it is still light so late, and it's only May. (When I talk to my dad, I'll say, oh, it's still light and he'll say, oh it's been dark a half hour already.) And I grieved some things. I grieved not knowing if I'll ever be a blushing bride (and yes, there's more to it than Jenna Bush as a blushing bride, but you know I don't always fully disclose). I cried. I wept, as I walked up Ferguson, past the house where I bought my $4 desk. Past houses with "Unstoppable" Penguins signs and "Go Pens!" signs. I grieved. I grieved. I grieved.

And as I turned onto Jackson, I realized that a) I'm extremely hormonal right now. b) I have a lot of unresolved things in my life, they are choosing to manifest themselves in this lack of romantic self esteem c) I need to take a chill pill. The fact that Max is no longer totally gaga over me, that no one is right now, does not discount the fact that he was, that men have in the past been gaga over me, and furthermore, God, the creator of heaven and earth, is gaga over me, my name is graven on his palm.

When I got home, as I unplugged my cell phone from where I had been charging it, my land line rang. And wouldn't you know, it was NH Sally. Who is one of the most down to earth people I know. Which can be annoying if you're in the depths of despair, because she is a real Marilla type. Marilla, as in Anne of GG: no sense worrying over spilt milk and stuff. Wow, I'd never made that connection until now. But it's true. Sally is very often the Marilla to my Anne of GG.

Speaking of Marilla and Anne, Marian's hair is red right now. It's lighter daily, as it washes out, but the first couple of days it was (in her words, not mine) like she was Carrot Top's sister.

Sally and I talked for a bit, and then she had to go and so I called Bird. Who is Anne of GG right there with me. I shared with her that someone I used to know is getting married soon, and that triggered something too, I'm sure.

And I don't have plans for Memorial Day. I'm going to spend Saturday night and Sun day down near Somerset with Sally and family and some Bellefielders, come back for church Sunday evening, and then Monday, which is my regular day to go to doctors and such...well, no one works on Memorial day except for the ticket tearers and the popcorn boys, so I'm going to the movies. I know, sacrilege, I was never an Indiana Jones fan (probably due only to the fact that I never got around to seeing them, may have seen part of the first one, but I would like to see Iron Man. Or Made of Honor. Or...I haven't been to the movies in a LONG time.

Okay, and it was 9:58, so I just watched David Cook become the American Idol. And it was so wonderful watching him sing, walk into the crowd, pull David Archuleta into the spotlight, to see them all arm in arm at the end. I DID NOT watch the two hour finale, just the last five minutes, and I'm sorry, but it was really heartwarming.

The weather today was like my mood swings--sunny, then rainy, then cloudy and cold, then sunny, then rainy, then sunny--no, I think the weather had more mood swings than me--welcome to Pittsburgh!!

I'm outta here!!! (I'm such a geek.)

Once more, with feeling... (10 answered, 0 to go!)

(3/9/08 update: THANKS EVERYONE, WE DID IT!)
(3/7/08 update) I don't think I've ever worked so hard on a meme...

Okay, Sarah at Lemony did it. Kim at All Consuming did it. Blackbird at SayLaVee did it. Badger did it. So, because memes are silly and right now I need silly, I give you...


The Movie Meme:

1. Pick 10 of your favorite movies.
2. Go to IMDB and find a quote from each movie.
3. Post them here for everyone to guess.
4. When someone guesses, put who guessed it and the movie.
5. GUESSERS: NO GOOGLING/using IMDb search functions. I mean, you can cheat if you want, but is it really that important?
6. One movie guess per blogger. Give people a chance to guess before you steal all of the awesome!*
6.5 try to not badger your friends to answer...
7. Thanks for playing, everyone! Just a few more, you know you can do it!!


The movies:

1. Marian the Librarian got this one, The Cutting Edge. Well, and she should have, she's the one that got me addicted to this movie about a hockey player turned figure skater.
(Father) "What about Spindler?"
(Russian Coach) "Spindler? Spindler say before he skate with her, he wear garlic from neck and sleep with cross. Who is left? I am at bottom of barrel."
(Father) "Then you find another barrel."

2. Em got this one, Almost Famous:
William: I'm glad you were home.
Lester Bangs: I'm always home. I'm uncool.
(the second Cameron Crowe movie on this list, and we are done!!)

3. Katy got this one. Home Alone. Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen. (Kevin)

4. Katrina got this one: Jerry Maguire: "Don't cry at the beginning of a date. Cry at the end, like I do." (Laurel) (the first of two movies on this list by Cameron Crowe.)

5. Katrina got this one: About a Boy "Suddenly I realized - two people isn't enough. You need backup. If you're only two people, and someone drops off the edge, then you're on your own. Two isn't a large enough number. You need three at least." (Marcus) (the first of two Nick Hornby books turned into a movie.)

6. Em got this one, A Knight's Tale. "Hope guides me. It is what gets me through the day and especially the night. The hope that after you're gone from my sight it will not be the last time I look upon you." (Sir Ulrich, in a letter to Jocelyn.)

7. Sarah O. got this one, woo hoo! High Fidelity.
"I can't fire them. I hired these guys for three days a week and they just started showing up every day. That was four years ago." (Rob) (and the second of two Nick Hornby books turned into film on this list.)

8. Katrina also guessed this one, which I wondered if anyone would. Persuasion. (The BBC one from 1995.) "Anne? You want to marry Anne? Whatever for?" (Anne's father)

9. Katrina got this one too (thanks! I was getting worried that noone had seen my ten favorite movies!) Enchanted April
Caroline: I want to just sit and not talk and not have to be the centre of attention all the time. You know what that's like don't you?
Rose: No.

10. Em also got this one. That thing you do. "When was the last time you were decently kissed? I mean, really, honestly good and kissed?" (Guy to Faye)

*I'm using Kim's asterisk thing--go for it, guess away, because I have no idea if anyone knows these (btw, GREAT) movies...but these are the ones I've watched again and again...

Update as I struggle with a bit of insomnia as I just added Katrina's answers: thank you both to Katy and Katrina for making me smile.

11. Katy got this one: Metropolitan, which is a great movie that I had to purchase because I could never find it even at video rental stores back in the day when we went to video rental stores...a wonderful movie!! When it came out at my college's movie theatre, the year I was a junior, I went to all three showings and from then on wanted pearls! Which I got in 1995 when my friend Sally became a Mary Kay consultant. (Back in the day when you got Majorcan pearls if you brought someone into the company.) (Now you just get a pearl pin.) Apparently this whole movie thing (and this vapid cold) is making me babble...

Audrey: What Jane Austen novels have you read?
Tom: None. I don't read novels. I prefer good literary criticism. That way you get both the novelists' ideas as well as the critics' thinking. With fiction I can never forget that none of it really happened, that it's all just made up by the author.

*******

(3/6/08 update:) Now, as you can see, I do not watch high profile movies. Geesh, I'm glad I didn't pick Picture Perfect! So I'll give out some hints, because you probably have seen these movies, maybe just not a gazillion times, like I have.

I haven't watched the gag reel yet...

As you may have read earlier this week, Sis hit it big when she gave me "The Family Stone" for Christmas. We saw it as a family last year--movies at, on, or near holidays are big in the Louise family. And as it was on my list, she got it.

And so I have been blubbering away for the past last bit of it... (THAT'S NOT A SPOILER!)

**********

Tomorrow I have to get out of the house by 8:30 am the latest, so this is tomorrow morning's post.

I am looking forward to the gag reel. I need a laugh.

Life is good. Friends are better. Love is the best. As the movie ended, I could only hear Amy Grant singing (in my mind, folks, in my mind. Amy Grant is NOT, I repeat, NOT, a part of the soundtrack of "The Family Stone")

"That's what love if for
Nothing else can do it.

Round off the edges
Talk us down from the ledges
Give us strength to try once more
Baby, that's what love is for
That's what love is for."

*****************

ah, don't you wish you knew what got deleted right here??? i'll never tell...

*****************

Time to make some popcorn for the gag reel. Thanks for reading and commenting, my dear ones.

"It was still hot." (Maurice Sendak)

(from Where the wild things are, about Max's dinner at the end of all his adventures.)

So remember how yesterday I said that things were looking up? Well, I thought they were. They are not. So if you are a pray-er, please pray for me, that I could not worry, but in faith, look up for my strength, and for healing. (The great thing about prayer is that God knows all the details.)

Last night was the first time I cried in his presence. I couldn't stop sniffling. Finally, I sent him home to get some sleep. Sweet man, first he changed the burned out light bulb in my stairwell. Which, silly as it was, did make me feel safer.

After our nutritious dinner from KFC, we watched "The Big Lebowski" which he prefaced by saying, "This is not a chick flick." I don't know why he said that (hee hee!). It was very funny.

I think a good rule of thumb with movies for me: a chick flick is a movie that I can watch alone. A non-chick flick is one that I need another person (or a theatre full of folks) there, to get the jokes and make funny faces at. Because if I had watched this by myself and not on the high recommend of Max (he owns the VHS, that's a pretty high recommend), I might not have thought it was funny.

Finland has produced so many brilliant distance runners because back home it costs $2.50 a gallon for gas. ~Esa Tikkannen, 1979 (corrected)

[dear reader, your blogger still lives under the impression that gas should be about $1.50, so she inevitably mis-quotes gas prices. I remember when gas was 99 Cents!!]

So I needed cash and was low on gas, so pulled into a station that has been holding steady at $1.71 $2.71 (USD). Filled the tank. Oh, and they DIDN'T have an ATM.

So I drove a little, took a different route b/c my usual route had construction, and at the BP, it was $1.67 $2.67. They did have an ATM. But see para #1, I had FILLED my tank.

After my appointment, I was going to meet two ladies that I'm going to DC with in two weekends. But I forgot I was going for the moment that it took me to take my normal exit, so I found myself crossing the river. Which is not what I wanted to do. So I drove down the road a pace, crossed the river AGAIN, and then took an earlier exit than I wanted to but it was all good, I got there. Oh, and since I drove through Aspinwall, I drove past the Sunoco where they're selling regular for $1.65 $2.65.

Sigh.

Of course I'm sure I'll get all sorts of snide comments now from bloggers who are paying $3.00 a gallon. The PRINCIPLE of this post is that once you've filled your tank, you inevitably will drive by at least one, possibly two gas stations that are selling gas at a lower rate than you spent.

Oh, and a moment of silence (MOMENT) for the Waterworks Cinema, which closed quite suddenly. Where will I go now to see movies? They changed mgmt like three times over the past ten years, so I'm not surprised, but that was my place, dudes!

Of course, I don't go to the movies as much anymore, but still. So many movie were seen by me there over the years:

While you were sleeping
Twister
Cinderella Story
The Postman (Il Postino)
Liar, Liar
Good Will Hunting
As good as it gets
Jerry Maguire (a first movie date)
Because I said so
Country of Women
Spiderman II

and many many more.*

------------
This list is not exclusive (have you met me?) or in any order except that While you were sleeping and Twister are ones I saw multiple times in the theatre. And Cinderella Story wasn't that great, but I do remember going to see it there.

I mean, I have their "movie phone" number MEMORIZED. In the age of caller ID and the cell phone, it is one of the few phone numbers I can recite off heart. Sigh.

Madeleine L'Engle didn't like Jane Austen and other tributes...

Publisher's weekly has a wonderful tribute to the Queen, with first person rememberences from five people who knew her well, including her granddaughter.

On the subject of Jane Austen, I've started reading Emma Thompson's script for Sense and Sensibility. Well, I'm actually still stuck on the introduction, written by one of the producers. Did you know it took fifteen years to get that project underway? Emma probably wrote as many drafts!!

More tributes for M L'E on blogs: Bookmoot

Random item from American Libraries email: The Bookinist, a German creation, a book chair that holds up to 80 paperbacks, its own lamp, a wheel, and a place for a magnifying glass, pencil sharpeners, etc.

A compendium of beautiful libraries...

LISNEWS is moving over to Drupal??

The official Madeleine L'Engle site...

The official talk like a pirate web site...

Who knew there was a National Unmarrieds week? It's Sept 17-23. Here's their website... An interesting (sad) fact I learned from census stats on their website--only 35% of singles vote. Married people are more likely to vote. Sad. I got the phone call today from Allegheny County asking if I'd be working the polls in November--YES!

God grant me the serenity....

I have the Serenity Prayer (the whole thing, not just the part you find on magnets at Whole Foods*) taped to one of my doorframes and this morning, while moving between the bathroom and the bedroom, I read it outloud to the air and to myself.

Living moment by moment? That's HARD!

Taking...this...world as it is, not as I would have it;

What? I have to accept things, this world??? As it is!! You gotta be kidding!

But here's the payout:

That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. (Reinhold Niebuhr)

Oh, because this is my current home! And I should be happy here!

Aside: the word serenity often reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where one of the dads (George's?) is going to this guru who tells him when things go bad to yell "Serenity now!" Which is so opposite of the Serenity Prayer...it makes me giggle. I watch Seinfeld so much less now, and TV in general since they moved Friends to My Pittsburgh TV, a channel I do not get. I used to come home on days I worked until 5 and it would be Friends, Frasier, Friends, Seinfeld. Now it's Frasier, Simpsons, Simpsons, Seinfeld. I like the Simpsons, yes, but not that much.

I did the Stuffed Animal Sleepover Friday evening and yesterday. Then I hung out at NH Sally's and watched this week's Beth Moore video, which was all about rest, which I thought very fitting, since I'm going on vacation!! Then Marian (the Librarian) and I went to the Original Pancake House for lunch and then off to see Stardust. While we waited for our table at OPH, we talked about stuff, including the movie we were about to see. Marian said she had the book and I swear I heard her say it was by Neil Diamond. So I didn't say anything right away but then later in the conversation it came up, because she said something else about Neil Gaiman I guess, and I said, oh, I thought you said Neil Diamond and I guess I wouldn't rush to read a scifi book written by him either. We had a giggle about that.

One of the great things about our friendship is that we read entirely different books for the most part. Our one common thread is Meg Cabot's chicklit. So I can tell Marian about a book and say, "You're not going to read this, are you?" and give her the end, and she can do the same with me.

We also giggle about silly things like this one branch that has been caught in the telephone wires for MONTHS, on Rte. 19. I mean, c'mon. The floods came, the winds came, entire trees fell on people's trucks and houses, and the branch IS STILL THERE! Whenever we go out to lunch, we drive by it, and it's still there! It's sort of like that song, "The cat came back..." (Which, OMG, has its own Wikipedia page that is VERY thorough...)

Now here's the reason why I am glad I work on Saturdays: I have no idea what to do on a Saturday afternoon! And it occurred to me that it's because I've been working almost every Saturday since 1995. So yesterday, when I came home from the movies, I lay down (because I am becoming my father's daughter and fell asleep for 5 minutes in the movie). But I wasn't THAT tired, so I got up and had a snack. Then I tried to watch TV. But it was either baseball, golf, or baseball, and I couldn't find the remote (so I can put the TV on channel 3) so that I could watch a video. So I lay down and took a nap. Then I got up, called my Mom, called NH Sally, went to KFC for some dinner (finger lickin good!) and came home, ate dinner, and lay back down again. I set my alarm for 10:15 to take my meds and I didn't get up, so when Max called around 11, I took my meds. He said he thought he was on the edge of it being too late to call and I said, it's okay, cause I've been sleeping all evening! And now I just took my meds!

Next week we'll both be in the land of unreliable cell coverage. I tell you, (as I told Marian) it is SO weird having a boyfriend. I mean, someone that calls me at home while they're on vacation? Someone that I say stuff like, "It's nice to hear your voice" to? I tell you, it's pretty bizarre. But I like it. (Grin.)

I think I'm going to Bellefield this morning. In part because hey, it puts off packing, but in part because it gives structure to this day and so I know that when I get home, I HAVE TO PACK! Plus, I haven't been there in ages, and I like checking in with folks. PLUS, if I see Kelly, I can give her the Beth Moore video, which saves me a trip to Greenfield today.

I read Everything and a kite by Ray Romano yesterday. He cracks me up. (I have to read two humor books for the library's summer reading program.)

Oh, and I said I might go to the work picnic...but I'm not packed...I do really want to see Janice and her baby...You know what, we're crossing that one off the list. Because that will take at least two hours out of this day and I DO really have to get my oil changed. And I'd rather drive up on an off day and see Janice and her baby and be able to visit, really visit. Whereas the picnic will be like going to a wedding and pretending that you'll be able to talk to the bride. And really, who wants to go to a WORK picnic the day before vacation? Not me.

Okay, so now that I have THAT worked out, I think I'll go for my walk.

You know the scene in Walk the Line where Reese Witherspoon is going through her bag to get to this book she wants to lend to Johnny Cash?

Here's the line: (Johnny Cash): You got a library in there, June. (You can thank the fine folks at imdb.com fer that.)

That's gonna be my carryon bag. Another thing I have to do today. Figure out which books to take...

Oh, and Stardust was good. If you like scifi movies, you'll love it. It didn't have enough conversation for me, which is probably why I fell asleep. Marian loved it, so I know it is a good movie.

So here's the docket for today:

1. go for walk
2. eat something, probably toast
   
3. go to Bellefield
4. get lunch
5. get oil changed (possibly BEFORE Bellefield, to put off the crowds)
6. pack: meds, books, and some clothes. My bathing suit is already in.
7. Pay bills that will be due while I'm gone
8. Make a box for my mail. (Thank you, Ms. Second Floor!)
9. Catch up on a few emails
10. researching if it's too late to buy Windows XP (a conversation with Marian got me worried) (I don't want Vista!)
11. going to the OD
    

Plus, spending the night at NH Sally's on Friday was like a dry run for going away. I remembered my toothbrush!

The day awaits. It is time to embrace it. (If I must....)
___________
*But I do have one of those magnets too.

Have a little faith in me...

So this week in the Breaking Free study homework, we're learning about obedience. Or rather, we're learning about rebellion. I have a hard time with this, I suppose because I know that we learn best through positive reinforcement, NOT SHAME. And this morning dear Beth wanted us to copy out what a rebellious child of God does TWICE, at the beginning of the lesson and again at the end, like Bart Simpson writing lines on the blackboard, I will not tell lies. So I rebelled and wrote out what an obedient child of God looks like.

One thing I did grab well and good from the lesson though was this new word (well, it is a very OLD word, but new to me): bitchah*. Now before you slam me for using the B word, it's not what you think and probably not pronounced the same way, since it's Hebrew. It is a word for trust and it is only used once in the Old Testament (How often is it used in the NT, she wonders?).

It is the word that means "there is nothing more one can do." So you HAVE to trust. Have faith, and rest in that trust. This is where phoning and writing letters and begging that friend to come back is the opposite of what you should do. Perhaps there are things you did that you need to say sorry for. (There usually are.) But trusting God, trusting, truly trusting, is that word, bitchah. It reminds me of the John Hiatt song, "Have a little faith in me." Because they always play it on movie soundtracks right when the one character has lost faith and might be leaving the other character. (It's used on the soundtrack for Phenomenon and Look who's talking now--huh, I just realized Travolta is in both of those movies, wonder if that's a coincidence?) Whenever I hear that song, I think of someone driving down a snowy road in LWTN, and the melody cries out, have a little faith in me, trust me on this one!!

So many songs have lyrics where it's like, I'm the one for you, trust me, where really, that trust is really only meant for God. When Sarah Brightman sang, "Deliver me...all of my life I've been in hiding, wishing there was someone just like you, now that I've found you, I know that you're the one to pull me through," well of course that's a God song. Because NO PERSON can pull us out completely. So it is fitting that David Crowder took that song and added "Jesus Jesus how I trust thee, how I've proved you o'er and o'er, Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus, Come and pull me through."

And the song "How do I live?" sung by Leanne Rimes, the songwriter was writing about how she felt about music. That her life would be not real, hard to survive, if she didn't have music. Because of course we can live when that person leaves us, dies, whatever. (Which ties into A long way down, the Nick Hornby book I'm reading/listening to, where JJ can't imagine his life without music.)

Can you tell this is something I've been holding in for a long time? I never liked those lyrics that said, "My life was transformed when you came into it," because I've always felt that was something that God did. God may have put that person INTO my life, but it was God that did the transforming, not merely that person's prescence.

I recently read something where it talked about how God gives us people in our lives as a way for us to love more. That friendships are another way of God loving us, and of us expressing God's love. That we NEED that community to thrive.

But I can't find where it was. I thought maybe in Blue Like Jazz (which I finished re-reading last night) or The friendships of women (which I'm working through again.) But I can't find the passage.

But this passage, from The friendships of women, sort of explains it (but it's NOT the passage I was looking for!):

It's important to love our friends, to cherish them, and to be committed to them. Girls and women are good at that--and it's a beautiful side to our friendships. But we need to learn to be dependent, leaning on God, because He's the only one who will never betray us or die or move away. (Dee Brestin)

So anyways, that's my soapbox for the morning. Go and have healthy relationships with people and with God. Happy Sunday morning.

(Oh, and all of what I write is me saying this to me--I do not have this figured out yet, btw!)

--------------
*It's used in Isaiah 30:15: in quietness and trust is your strength... Okay, from Strong's Hebrew Bible Dictionary, I love this, it's the FEMININE version of another word on trust, betach. Of COURSE it's the FEMININE version. Hee...So I guess it's only used in the feminine version once in the OT...still no news on if it's used in the NT...

Sarah Louise goes to Sandcastle (updated)

Sandcastle: a water park just outside the Pittsburgh city limits.

Woo hoo! Steubenville Kelly and I are going to pray that the 20% chance of thunderstorms stays away.

I feel a post about "Jerry Maguire" coming up--I love that movie! Why I don't have the soundtrack is a mystery to me.

And I can't find my soundtrack to "Almost Famous." Yesterday at Tazza they were playing one of the songs off it.

Am reading Nick Hornby's Long Way Down. It is wonderful.

Okay, gotta go!

friends n'at

(S)he drew a
circle that
shut me out--
Heretic, rebel,
a thing to
flout.

But Love and I
had the wit to
win
We drew a
circle that
took her in!

("Outwitted" by Edwin Markham)

Well, I still haven't figured out a circle to draw Lilly back in, and perhaps we won't be as close as we were...I don't know. I'm not ready to fight that battle right now. My fighting gloves are off.

**********
Watched the end of "My life as a teenage drama queen" last night on ABC.

I love the lyrics to the last song:

That girl was a one time teenage drama queen
A hot, tough everyday wannabe...but she'll have changed her destiny.. now she's a somebody.
That girl was a wild child dreamer but she found herself.
Cuz she believes in nothin else and you'll look back
and you wont believe that girl was me.

Geez, maybe I should rename this blog Pink Sneakers and Lyrics I love. Well, but music is a thing with me. Good thing I'm dating a piano player...

D'Oh!

(Or "Sarah Louise and Max go to the movies.")

Yes, I recommend The Simpsons movie. If you are already a Simpsons fan. Luckily, when I lived in Virginia, the Simpsons was a part of regular pre-dinner entertainment, and before that, I dated one rabid Simpsons fan, and I do have male friends. (Which is to say, if the show is on, I'll watch it, but it's not something I willingly turn on as entertainment.)

We could not stop laughing.

Fortunately, I'd read the Christianity Today review, so I knew I'd probably like it. Plus, the little trivia tidbits I'd picked up (that at the beginning of the show's run, Homer was supposed to be Krusty the Clown, sort of like Peter Parker and Spiderman, but MG nixed that idea) were helpful on the ride home.

Oh, and if you go, YOU MUST WATCH ALL THE CREDITS. If you know me, you know this is a point of contention in my nuclear family. And I didn't stay for the credits when I saw HP #5 b/c I didn't think I could explain my strange obsession to Laura and Marian (the Librarian). But I have this thing with watching the credits. It's like the postlude at church. I like to sit there after I've seen a movie. I never know who any of the people are, but it's fun imagining what a lip...something does. (They had one, in TSM's credits.) Anyways, there are comic shorts interspersed in the credits. You'll thank me for this one, you will.

Fortunately, as I had read the CT review, I knew this, so I didn't have to explain my obsession to Max. Phew! (Yes, it was our first movie.)

******

Friday night, whilst waiting for my buzzer thing to go off at ze Olive Garten, a guy came out to take a cell call. "No, I'm having dinner with Heather's mom and grandmother right now." (Where's Heather, I wondered.) "Yeah, I'd love to. No, she's not really into them." (Immediately I knew he was talking to his guy friend about going to see TSM.) They talked about going to play hockey and then vowed to talk later tonight about showtimes.

One thing I do... (updated)

Luke 10, 28-42

Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village, where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to what he was saying. But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him and asked, ‘Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.’ But the Lord answered her, ‘Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.’

Lord, teach me the sort of kindness that takes cues from other people's needs, not from my own plans.

(from Sacred Space, for today, Sunday, July 22, 2007)

I have on my bathroom wall a print of a Leonardo Da Vinci Michelangelo sketch. On it, is a quote from the master: "I am still learning." It is such a comfort to me, and such a testament to the life Leonardo Da Vinci Michelangelo lived--always learning. I admit I know far less of this man than I should, but I do know this--he experimented with everything.

(I am always learning, too, to read what the name is of people's quotes that people my bathroom walls...)

So I am learning to "take cues from other people's needs, not from my own plans." Yesterday morning, instead of going in at 9, when I could have, I went in at 10, as I had requested to come in later because I was planning on attending the HP party, which in the end I did not do. I moved slowly about my morning, which was nice, for once, to just relax. I finished watching "Bruce Almighty," which if anything is a movie about "tak[ing] cues from other people's needs, not from my own plans." I had heard about "Bruce Almighty," that one of the things Jim Carrey's character did as "God" was to make his girlfriend's boobs bigger. From this, I thought, not the movie for me. But Monday, in my distress over "what is going on, am I on the right path in my life, etc, etc" and being at the chiropractor's office way too long, I had a heart to heart with the receptionist, who said "BA" changed the life of her husband and converted him to Christianity. Now that is a testimony I'll hear. Now I wanted to see this movie. Since "Evan Almighty" is currently in the theatres, there are all kinds of interviews with the director, who (I didn't know this) also directed "Liar, Liar," one of my favorite films. He sees laughter as a ministry and doesn't care who his audience is or if they take a bigger message from his movies. He does not see himself as a Christian director or one who makes religious films. Rather, he is a director who makes funny films, and he happens to be a Christian, so that oozes out. The man quoted Madeleine L'Engle!!

Madeleine L'Engle talks about this in her book Walking on Water—that you would think it would be our Christianity that affects our art, but it's more like our art affects our Christianity. We're storytellers, and by engaging in stories, you become more aware of the human condition, of the journey, of the challenges. And that affects our faith. So we don't target faith-based audiences, but we do think the faith-based audience will enjoy this film. (Tom Shadyac, in "Make 'em laugh," Christianity Today, 6/19/07)

Now, I adore ML'E, but if you're gonna be quoting her, by all means, quote my favorite of her non-fiction works, Walking on Water, a book that was given to me as I was learning what it meant to be a Christian, in my senior year of high school/freshman year of college. That art is bigger than me, that all good art is Christian, even if the artist is not, because art is about creation, and the great artist realizes that and has a connection to the divine.

Can it really be 5:09 am?

Yes, yes it is. Yikes. This insomnia has got to go!!

One of the things I love about this medium (blogging) is that I can do what I want, to a degree. I can break out of a post about today's lectionary and write about current movies and then quote a poem. No one is grading me on this, no one is paying me to stay on one topic.

So I'll end with this and then go do something about the gnawing that is in my stomach.

He drew a
circle that
shut me out--
Heretic, rebel,
a thing to
flout.
But Love and I
had the wit to
win
We drew a
circle that
took him in!

"Outwitted" by Edwin Markham.

I think I am the one drawing circles these days. Afraid that I will be shut out, I draw a circle that I can stand in alone. But again and again, people reach out to me, saying, come, be in the wider circle. For this I am grateful, and pleasantly surprised. I am afraid of being abandoned, and time and again, people break into my life and force me to see that they are not going away. Thank you, if you are one of those people.

*************

Happy Sunday. May your day be restful.

I, for my part, will be working my way through Harry Potter #7. I'm about 1/3 through. I've been enjoying this delicious weather and I intend to sit on the front porch with some iced tea and enjoy it some more.

All this time...

...I've been wanting to be my mother. Married at 26, first child at 28. Or at least married by 28. (That was my original goal.)

Those anniversaries passed.

...so then I wanted to be my grandmother, married in Brazil, divorced and then married to my grandfather at 36, had my mother when she was 40 (And that was in the 1940s!).

I'll be 36 in less than six months...

...then I thought, I'll be Aunt Margaret, who eloped with Uncle Ed when she was 50 and after he died, she was a rich widow and endowed my mom and aunt with trips to summer camp, magazine subscriptions, and the like.

And I've resented my sister, who is shocked that at 25 she is not married. I think, she better not get married before me--the whole Rachel/Leah story, the "fairy tale" oldest daughter must marry first syndrome.

And I've made a game of counting: pregnant women, engaged women, newlywed women. They are all around.

But I forgot someone in this mix: Me.

What do I want? And what is life handing me? And what will I do with the mix? More importantly, how do I love where I am and love where they are at the same time?

Inevitably, I will turn the dial on the radio and catch the end of Rascal Flatts singing "God Bless the Broken Road (that led me straight to you.)"

Inevitably, I realize I am glad to be single in this moment. To be childless. To be Auntie Sarah Louise.

It feels good to be happy in my skin. And it feels good to stretch my legs and walk. It feels good to be ME.

When I was seventeen, it was a very bad year. When I was twenty four and twenty five, too. When I was twenty eight, I was learning how to live with psych meds and weekly therapy sessions. And then there was the drought. But now I'm thirty five. And I am glad to be alive. To have a job I love most days. To have a garret I adore. To have a trusty twelve year old car (that's paid for!).

And so I'm in no rush. Which feels absolutely wonderful (and absolutely foreign and scary, too.)

************

If you went to see Ratatoille (I cannot spell it, I refuse!) and are in the mood for another culinary delight, watch Mostly Martha (it's in German, so mind the subtitles.) The American remake is coming out this summer--I think it's called No Reservations with the chick that married Michael Douglas. (Catherine Zeta-Jones.) (Warning: it is a chick flick, and you will probably want your trusty Kleenex box nearby.) (But it's good crying.)

I'm tired. I'm going to bed. Perchance to dream, and SLEEP. And to wake up tomorrow. N'at.

In which Sarah Louise eschews thoughts of her vacation in favor of talking about books...

Yes, I promise more vackay pics to come. But as I am at work, manning (womanning) the Summer Reading desk, I thought it more apropos to write about books.

Kids books I am loving:

Ramona and her mother (Beverly Cleary). I somehow read most of B. Cleary but never Ramona! This year my intent was to do Ramona's World for the Mother Daughter book club, since it starts at the beginning of fourth grade (and the MD club is for fourth and fifth grade girls) but somehow I transposed the titles and so all the publicity went out saying Ramona Forever, where Ramona is in third grade and a flower girl in a wedding. Ramona is soon becoming one of my favorite literary heroines.

I just finished Ramona and her Mother, where Ramona wants to be her "mother's girl." It's one of the books for the Mother Child Smackdown, which seemed like a good idea--a quiz show format highlighting 8 books, but now it's like those 8 books are all I'm allowed to read until I come up with enough questions...

The chapter books:
Sarah Plain and Tall by Patty MacLachlan
Freaky Friday by Mary Rodgers (the audio is FANTASTIC)
Saffy's Angel by Hilary McKay (I'm actually getting tired of this wonderful book. It truly is wonderful.)
Ramona and her mother (see above)
The School Story by Andrew Clements (LOVE LOVE this book. Clements is a master. Haven't read Frindle yet, it's next on my list.)

The picture books:
A Chair for my mother by Vera B. Williams
My mama had a dancing heart by Libba M. Gray
Blueberries for Sal by Robert McCloskey.

I have decided to not do "quiz" questions for My mama had a dancing heart as it would ruin the book, kind of like when I had to do vocabulary words for A Wrinkle in Time in 7th grade. I couldn't read AWIT for seven years after that soul carving experience.

So far I have three teams signed up. I need to get prizes together n'at. It's a good challenge but I won't really know if it's worth it until after all is said and done, next Saturday (which happens to also be Bastille Day.)

**************

In other news, we (the rents and moi) went to see the movie Paris J'te Aime--WOW! It seemed a little longer than two hours, it was hard to keep track of how many vignettes we'd seen, but they were all wonderful (well, Elijah Wood as vampire was my least favorite). I especially loved the last one, in which the American mail carrier fell in love with Paris. It reminded me of Carrie's love affair with New York City and how New York is the fifth character in "Sex and the City."

MTC,

Sarah Louise

Time to start thinking about Christmas...

Yes, it's July. Have you made your list and checked it twice?

Yes, according to Women's Wall Street, it's time to think about who and how much and all that. But I prefer chickens. Chickens will take you out of any dark mood. So, from Savage Chickens, here it is, The Christmas Carol.

In other news, the parents will be in town today. So I'll pick them up in Moon Twp. and vacuum my car at the free car vacuum (more on this later) and we'll do stuff, like go see a movie about Paris. (My dad wanted to see Waitress, but um, movies don't stay around that long in this town.)

Happy Fourth, to all my readers in the USA. And for the rest, here's a super corny joke:

Do they have Fourth of July in Australia? Yep, it comes right after July third and right before July fifth.

May the fourth be with you, n'at.

You can pull all you like, and have it your way, but this door is pretty stubborn...

(seen on a door marked "PUSH" at Burger King.)

I had to laugh. I went to ALDI to get frozen waffles for breakfast, but when they were all out and my stomach was clearly saying "feed me!" (Feed me, Seymour, feed me!) I went across the highway to BK. I got one of their breakfast croissants, and sat reading The joy of doing things badly by Veronica Chambers. On the other side of the divider were tables full of retired old men, doing what they do best, passing the time with a cup of Senior Coffee.

I'm pretty stubborn too. I've been on my own for a long time now, and I know what makes me happy and what makes me mad.

Things that make me happy:

• Looking at paintings and drawings at the Frick, with someone else. I never look that closely when I'm by myself, figuring out the stories the pictures show, counting the flies in the Dutch still lifes.
• Grilled cheese sandwiches. I've had them twice this week.
  
• Singing. Listening to songs. Tapping my fingers to the beat.
  
• My friends--all of a sudden they have bloomed out of every corner, like the honeysuckle about a week ago.
  
• Seeing groundhogs (this morning, one) or possoms (last week, one) when I clearly live smack dab in the confines of the City of Pittsburgh.
• Seeing a wild turkey cross the road with her turklings (what are they called?) on the way to work one day last week.
  

Things that make me mad (or just annoyed):

• Remembering how I stayed with men who wanted too much, too soon.
  
• That economics still defines how we live our lives.
  
• That I have to pack pills and call in refills for a trip that is in less than seven days.
• That I have to spend my day going from doctor to doctor.
  
• That I left a vinyl record (duh!) in my car on a hot day and it's warped now, so I'll have to pay for its replacement.
  
• That I second guess my spelling. (Is that really it's or is it its?)
• That I really have to get on with my day. My list for today (not counting the remaining three doctor's appts, I've already been to see the chiropractor) is over ten items long.
  

I took a walk this morning, when I woke up at 7:30, wondering what my life is going to be these days. As a jogger passed me on the right, I had a flash of Téa Leoni in Spanglish, and all of a sudden, of how she fought for her marriage by not panicking when her husband stayed out late, the night he spent at the restaurant with Paz Vega.

Gotta go. Have to cross something off the list before I'm on the road again...

"Somebody's gonna drop everything, Run out and crank up their car..."

Never stop to think 'what's in it for me' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who you're friends are

(Tracy Lawrence, "Find out who your friends are")

Yes, I like country music. You got a problem with that??

So....Guess who locked her keys in her car? When I called her, EE Sally said, if you call Triple A, you'll waste a lot of time, I'll come. I was on my way home, parked at the Taco Bell, in Etna, and she is the only person with an extra set of my car keys, so I did call her first, saying, first, "I can call Triple A." She said, "I'll rescue you."

Which, she did, and then I stood outside my unlocked car and she sat in hers and we talked about random things like why Peabody HS had their prom on a school night...

**************

Also, thank you for all the comments and emails. I've started listening to It's called a breakup because it's broken (which is a much better book than He's just not into you) and I think my heart is moving on.

So I'm just a simple gal, trying to figure out how to not whine too much and make this relevant but still be me, which is smart but smarting, and not really interested in hearing breastfeeding stories this week.

In other news, NH Sally said (as we sat on her terrace in the shade over lunch), she'll plan my wedding shower and we'll have sangria and we'll play the "mawiage" scene from The Princess Bride. Wow, I'm excited about that. Now I just need to find a man...*

(which for some reason made me think of Monica Geller and her jam plan and then her baby plan.)

*(which made PJ at work grab her hands over her mouth...) (She's often apt to say that the only reason they're still married is laziness--she's too lazy and he never gets rid of anything.)

Bed. I think it's time to go to bed.