You can pull all you like, and have it your way, but this door is pretty stubborn...

(seen on a door marked "PUSH" at Burger King.)

I had to laugh. I went to ALDI to get frozen waffles for breakfast, but when they were all out and my stomach was clearly saying "feed me!" (Feed me, Seymour, feed me!) I went across the highway to BK. I got one of their breakfast croissants, and sat reading The joy of doing things badly by Veronica Chambers. On the other side of the divider were tables full of retired old men, doing what they do best, passing the time with a cup of Senior Coffee.

I'm pretty stubborn too. I've been on my own for a long time now, and I know what makes me happy and what makes me mad.

Things that make me happy:

• Looking at paintings and drawings at the Frick, with someone else. I never look that closely when I'm by myself, figuring out the stories the pictures show, counting the flies in the Dutch still lifes.
• Grilled cheese sandwiches. I've had them twice this week.
  
• Singing. Listening to songs. Tapping my fingers to the beat.
  
• My friends--all of a sudden they have bloomed out of every corner, like the honeysuckle about a week ago.
  
• Seeing groundhogs (this morning, one) or possoms (last week, one) when I clearly live smack dab in the confines of the City of Pittsburgh.
• Seeing a wild turkey cross the road with her turklings (what are they called?) on the way to work one day last week.
  

Things that make me mad (or just annoyed):

• Remembering how I stayed with men who wanted too much, too soon.
  
• That economics still defines how we live our lives.
  
• That I have to pack pills and call in refills for a trip that is in less than seven days.
• That I have to spend my day going from doctor to doctor.
  
• That I left a vinyl record (duh!) in my car on a hot day and it's warped now, so I'll have to pay for its replacement.
  
• That I second guess my spelling. (Is that really it's or is it its?)
• That I really have to get on with my day. My list for today (not counting the remaining three doctor's appts, I've already been to see the chiropractor) is over ten items long.
  

I took a walk this morning, when I woke up at 7:30, wondering what my life is going to be these days. As a jogger passed me on the right, I had a flash of Téa Leoni in Spanglish, and all of a sudden, of how she fought for her marriage by not panicking when her husband stayed out late, the night he spent at the restaurant with Paz Vega.

Gotta go. Have to cross something off the list before I'm on the road again...